Thanks To Caregivers

Now for Caregivers
(Taken From 2/19/18 Lives Changed Radio Show)
Written by Deb Lundquist

February 17, 2018

Thank you from the bottom of our hearts. Thank you for being there for us every day of our lives. We may not say it often enough, but not only do we appreciate you, but we love you and we need you more than you will ever know!

We know that you don’t really understand what is happening to our body’s. Shoot, we don’t either. Every day, it seems like something new is happening to our body’s. We are afraid and we don’t want you to know just how afraid we are. We have anxiety disorder because we are afraid and we know that we drive you crazy with that and sometimes our OCD gets out of control because we don’t have the energy to straighten things up, so we want things just so. We don’t do things just to upset you.

We know that you don’t get any support, even less support than we do. People don’t understand what you go through any more than they understand what we do. They don’t understand the worry you suffer because they don’t understand your life either. They don’t understand that when our lives turned upside down, yours turned upside down too.

Let me, as a patient, give you some ideas that my husband and I have put together to help both of us, patients and caregivers.

Caregivers:

Although you do need to be home more often than not, still you need to take care of yourselves. If you don’t take care of your physical and mental health as well as ours, you will soon find yourself going down the rabbit hole.

  • In order to do this, you need to make sure you are taking good natural nutrients as well your Fibro person.
  • Make sure you go to the Doctor if you need to go. Stay away from sick people, not just for yourself, but your Fibro person is not more susceptible if you bring something home.
  • You also tend to lose friends, so try to maintain some social interactions, remembering that you need to be just a phone call away if help is needed. Bob goes to church even though I can’t always go.
  • You need to be continuing to do things you find enjoyable. For instance, my husband goes to auctions with his brother. He goes to sales with him as well. He also loves to mow the lawn, we have 3 acres, where he can have his one-on-one time with God. He loves to play his games on the computer, plus he researches things on the computer, as well. He keeps busy working on the house and is always looking for excuses to go on a road trip. He is working part-time and making new friendships that way as well, he is retired.
  • Keep your spirts up and stay emotionally well-balanced. If you need help with this, be sure to get it! This is important for you and your family, just as it is important that your Fibro person do the same.
  • Spend time together doing things you both like so that your relationship stays strong. You don’t always have to be a caregiver, but friends, a couple, whatever. You can go out to eat, see a movie or take a drive. Just as long as you are doing something you both enjoy together, that is what is important.
  • Remember, you were friends, a couple or whatever first and that should always be worked on together by both of you to stay strong through all of this for it to work.

Now for the patient:

The patient’s needs will vary from day to day, unfortunately. Sometimes all we need is to sleep. It just depends on the weather, our stress, or our disease and how it is behaving on any single day.

We need you to make the kitchen an easy and safe place for us to use. Meals safe and easy to make, or even better already made so that all we have to made so that all we have to do is microwave them.

We need our living space to be made easy and safe places to access with internet access and with ready phone access. Our lives are mainly based on the internet. That is where we do most of our socializing.

Try to get our friends to come to our house to socialize with us there, so that we can keep our friendships. Maybe see if our church will do Bible studies and fellowship at our house, because it is so hard for us to leave our house. Little things like that would mean so much to us.

It is hard for us to clean our house, although we sit and see the mess. If you can see that it is bothering us, maybe you can see if someone can clean the house for us.

We love conversation, games, people. So, if you can see that we can get people involved with us we would love it.

Anyway, with all this said, we love everything that you do for us, but we want you to take care of yourselves too. We want to stay with us and not desert us, so please, we love you, don’t get burnt out by taking care of us and only us. Try to understand what we are going through. Talk to us and make sure our communication is open because that is key to all of this.

Please remember that you are very important to us and we love you!

Deb Lundquist
 

After 18 years of living with this as a roommate, I feel I know Fibromyalgia well. Now, it is my passion to help people with Fibromyalgia and chronic pain take back control of their lives.